Second CVS

I scheduled my second CVS this morning. I will have it done Tuesday morning, and this time they will be prescribing me pain pills ahead of time so hopefully I won't go through as much pain. Let's hope this one goes better than the last one!

CVS Update

It is not good news. I got a call from the nurse tonight and she said that the lab in Santa Fe called and there was not enough of a sample to look at the chromosomes. I am devastated.Now I have to choose whether I want to do another CVS, which would have to be done next week, wait for a amniocentesis, or do nothing at all and wait to see what happens. My doctor was hesitant to do the first CVS due to the heart rate being so high, so doing a second one would increase the already high chance for a miscarriage even more. On the other hand, I don't even know if my pregnancy will make it to 15 weeks to have the amniocentesis done. I'm calling the office back tomorrow with my decision, but I'm just so torn right now and have no idea what I'm going to do. 

Meet Our Baby

Although I have been filled with a lot of worry and sadness lately, I've also been trying to look at the positive things. In the last few ultrasounds I've had this week I can't help but smile when I see my baby kicking it's legs and sucking it's thumb, I always feel as if it is waving hello to me. I love this baby no matter what may come with it, whatever outcome may happen it has changed my life and made me love so much more. Next week when I recieve test results I will also find out the sex of the baby. It took me a while to figure out if I wanted to know, thinking it might make the situation more difficult, but now I really do want to know. This baby has a heart, it will have a name, it will be loved.

CVS Procedure

We went in and met with a genetic councilor, and then with a doctor and nurse, then I was prepared for the CVS. I had it done vaginally since it was determined there was no way to do it through the abdomen. The procedure did not go well, it took almost twenty minutes when it should only take a few, my placenta was way higher than they had thought and had a very difficult time getting a sample. It was more painful than labor, and they only ended up with a very small sample, possibly not enough to determine anything. Because the baby's heart rate was in the 190's the doctor said my risk of miscarriage from this is significantly higher and that it might very well happen in the next week. I'm going back for another ultrasound next Wednesday and should get my test results by next Thursday. If the sample was too small I have to choose whether or not I want to go through the procedure again, if I choose to do it again the chance for a miscarriage is even higher. I’m hoping I get results back, if they come back negative than it is most likely a heart defect. Whatever happens I'm in for a long road ahead of me, and will probably have to see more specialists. I'm praying for the best right now, even though I don't know what that is. 

Our Story

Yesterday was the day that my world was turned upside down. Three weeks ago we found out during the ultrasound that the baby's heart rate was too high, over 200. I went back yesterday to have a follow up ultrasound and the heart rate dropped down to 188, which was still too high. They also noticed that the nuchal fold was measuring to large, and it is highly likely that it is a chromosomal abnormality or a heart defect. I talked to both my OB and a specialist and after they looked at everything, both of them said that I'm going to lose the baby. There is a 10-15% percent chance that I could carry the baby to term, but most likely it would be stillborn or pass away shortly afterward.  Right now I have the option to do some testing, which I think Jon and I have decided that we are going to do, it would be helpful to at least have a diagnosis, though it won't make this any easier. Either way I will need to choose whether or not to end the pregnancy now or wait to miscarry, which could happen at any time during my pregnancy. None of them said that there is a possibility to come out of this situation with a living baby. It is so difficult to see your child kicking their legs and sucking their thumb, and then moments later have someone tell that child is not going to live. This is going to be the hardest choice I have ever made, right now I plan to wait and pray.